COUNT DOWN TO A HAPPIER FAMILY: 10 STRATEGIES TO TACKLE ENTITLEMENT AT HOME IN 2013
Kay Wyma, ‘Recovering Enabler’ Now the Author of ‘Cleaning House,’ Shares Top Tips for Teaching Kids How Capable They Can Be
TheMoatBlog.com
DALLAS – Dec. 20, 2012 – A Dallas mother of five kids who worked in the White House and earned an MBA in international finance has tackled a really tough task—pushing back against the “entitlement mentality” she helped to develop in her children. In its place, Kay Wills Wyma instills competence and confidence born from helping them develop the skills and traits needed to launch from home successfully.
In her book Cleaning House A Mom’s Twelve-Month Experiment to Rid Her Home of Youth Entitlement Kay details her yearlong effort to help her kids learn the joy of accomplishment and capability. Following are 10 strategies for parents resolving that 2013 will be the “Year Entitlement Ended” in their homes.
10. Be honest . . . with yourself and with your kids. The first step to change is admitting, “I have a problem.” Welcome to Enablers Anonymous. It might not be pretty, but we’ve all driven here on the road paved with good intentions.
9. Have a family meeting. Announce the plan and involve the participants. If everyone owns it, the seeds sprout and grow.
8. Gather like-minded friends. It’s lonely doing anything seemingly alone, especially when swimming upstream. So grab some friends and do it together.
7. Keep your eyes on the goal by looking back. George Washington at 16 was surveying Culpepper County, Va. – without his parents!; at age 12, Blaise Pascal worked out the first 23 propositions of Euclid by himself; at age 15 Louis Braille invented the Braille system; at age 14 my friend Jackie worked at her local dry cleaner—responsible for daily deposits and closing up the store. The point is . . . kids are more than capable.
6. Set the bar high. Kids, like all of us, thrive on high expectations. Seriously, who likes to work for someone who takes your stuff and does it over or steps in and completes it for you? Our kids don’t like it either.
5. Think teflon. Don’t be fooled by the whines; let the "noooooo" and "why me?!" barrage hit and slide right off. Those kids are only feigning disdain. They actually crave feeling useful and needed.
4. Pack any baggage and park it outside—forever. Whatever fears buckle a parent’s knees (“my kid will be left out,” “their feelings will be hurt,” “they will never get into college,” “they will fail if I don’t – or pay someone to – do it for them”) can and should be disregarded. Kids can do so much more than we or they think. Teach them how to do a task. Train them by getting out of the way. Then watch mountains formerly seen as obstacles morph into opportunities.
3. Welcome and keep your hands off a kid’s failure. There are few prouder moments than witnessing your child fall, get up, fall, get up, stay up and capitalize on newfound strength, determination and real self-esteem.
2. Learn to use and mean the words, “I’m happy for you.” Despite our best efforts to make it a competition, parenting isn’t about one-upping each other. It’s about loving our kids and celebrating their unique gifts and talents. It’s OK to celebrate our friends’ talents and teach our kids to do the same. More than OK . . . dare we admit, liberating.
1. Get ready to catch yourself saying: “Who knew?!” “Who knew my kids could do so much?” “Who knew they could serve their sibling?” (I mean how else can you describe a boy folding his sister’s underwear, or a girl cleaning her brother’s bathroom!) “Who knew they could be so happy?” “Who knew gaming, texting and social media could take a back seat?” “Who knew they just wanted someone to believe in them . . . and that family responsibilities were just the ticket?”
About Kay Wills Wyma
Author Kay Wills Wyma has five kids and one SUV with a lot of carpool miles. Before she transitioned to stay-at-home mom, she earned an MBA, worked at the White House and worked in international finance. Happily married to Jon, this recovering enabler is committed to equipping the next generation to achieve great things in the future by piling on the responsibility today. Kay enjoys inspiring other parents of adolescents and teens through her blog TheMoatBlog.com.
To learn more, visit: WaterBrookMultnomah.com
TheMoatBlog.com
Showing posts with label Christian writer. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Christian writer. Show all posts
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
'Work, Love, Pray' Launches Oct. 23: Book Offers New GPS to Women's Career-Life Balance
UPDATED ‘WORK, LOVE, PRAY’ LAUNCHES OCT. 23: NEW GPS TO WOMEN’S CAREER-LIFE BALANCE
WHAT: Can executive women have it all? Wrong question, so says Diane Paddison, a high-level corporate executive and author of Work, Love, Pray, guiding career women to balance work, family and faith values. Starting with her own story, Paddison, chief strategy officer of Cassidy Turley, advises on grad school, first jobs, marriage, finding family-friendly companies—and keeping family first.
Read Paddison’s Recent USA Today Op-Ed http://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/2012/10/09/full-time-ceo-doesnt-equal-part-time-mom/1623389/
WHO: Diane Paddison, Harvard MBA, is chief strategy officer of Cassidy Turley and three times the only female member on the executive team at a Fortune 500 company. She’s also a wife, mother and Christian. Diane founded and heads 4word, a city-by-city and online organization linking career women with mentors and peers.
WHEN: Work, Love, Pray lands in bookstores and on Amazon and Kindle Oct. 23, 2012
WHY: The Atlantic, The Economist, USA Today and others are debating career vs. motherhood. Paddison steps in with practical advice. It’s not either/or, she says; and while “having it all” is a myth, balance is not. Paddison also is behind the growing number of 4word city chapters—the long-missing link between career women and mentors and peers.
SYNOPSIS: As women rise in today's workforce, old best practices fall short. Work, Love, Pray is new personal wisdom for every stage in the burgeoning category of women’s professional lives. Along with her own ups and downs, Diane presents 15 other “been there” female execs with sound advice on career progress without compromise. Work, Love, Pray also is a must-read for husbands, pastors and mentors.
STORY IDEAS: In USA Today—Does Full-Time Career Mean Part-Time Mom? Yahoo’s new CEO Marissa Mayer, hired while she was pregnant, gave birth in October. Diane’s recent op-ed in USA Today builds on Mayer’s example to say that both rearing children and rising in a career, increasingly, are women’s new normal.
Do Churches “Get” It? The small-but-growing trend for churches supporting moms with careers echoes stats in Work, Love, Pray:
For the first time, women in the workplace outnumber men.
In 1971 only 3 percent of all lawyers were women, today, it’s 37 percent.
The percentage of women in college (57 percent) tops men (43 percent).
Almost half of all law and medical degrees go to women, up from about 10 percent in 1970.
AUTHOR Diane Paddison
PUBLISHER Zondervan
FORMAT Paperback
To learn more:
4word 4wordwomen.org
Connect on Facebook Facebook.com/4wordwomen
WHAT: Can executive women have it all? Wrong question, so says Diane Paddison, a high-level corporate executive and author of Work, Love, Pray, guiding career women to balance work, family and faith values. Starting with her own story, Paddison, chief strategy officer of Cassidy Turley, advises on grad school, first jobs, marriage, finding family-friendly companies—and keeping family first.
Read Paddison’s Recent USA Today Op-Ed http://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/2012/10/09/full-time-ceo-doesnt-equal-part-time-mom/1623389/
WHO: Diane Paddison, Harvard MBA, is chief strategy officer of Cassidy Turley and three times the only female member on the executive team at a Fortune 500 company. She’s also a wife, mother and Christian. Diane founded and heads 4word, a city-by-city and online organization linking career women with mentors and peers.
WHEN: Work, Love, Pray lands in bookstores and on Amazon and Kindle Oct. 23, 2012
WHY: The Atlantic, The Economist, USA Today and others are debating career vs. motherhood. Paddison steps in with practical advice. It’s not either/or, she says; and while “having it all” is a myth, balance is not. Paddison also is behind the growing number of 4word city chapters—the long-missing link between career women and mentors and peers.
SYNOPSIS: As women rise in today's workforce, old best practices fall short. Work, Love, Pray is new personal wisdom for every stage in the burgeoning category of women’s professional lives. Along with her own ups and downs, Diane presents 15 other “been there” female execs with sound advice on career progress without compromise. Work, Love, Pray also is a must-read for husbands, pastors and mentors.
STORY IDEAS: In USA Today—Does Full-Time Career Mean Part-Time Mom? Yahoo’s new CEO Marissa Mayer, hired while she was pregnant, gave birth in October. Diane’s recent op-ed in USA Today builds on Mayer’s example to say that both rearing children and rising in a career, increasingly, are women’s new normal.
Do Churches “Get” It? The small-but-growing trend for churches supporting moms with careers echoes stats in Work, Love, Pray:
For the first time, women in the workplace outnumber men.
In 1971 only 3 percent of all lawyers were women, today, it’s 37 percent.
The percentage of women in college (57 percent) tops men (43 percent).
Almost half of all law and medical degrees go to women, up from about 10 percent in 1970.
AUTHOR Diane Paddison
PUBLISHER Zondervan
FORMAT Paperback
To learn more:
4word 4wordwomen.org
Connect on Facebook Facebook.com/4wordwomen
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